I continuously have people asking me questions about my allergies, how to deal with their allergies/intolerances/dietary issues.
I don't mind these questions. I'm not a doctor (yet), so I can't give medical advice. My usual path is to offer some general suggestions, and recommend they speak to a professional. I've had one year of training not, 3-4 years of specialist training in nutrition, and no on the job experience, and I certainly don't have a supervising doctor to ask questions. However, I do know the stores to shop at, what things tend to work, websites, how to find resources, etc.
These aren't the only type of questions and comments I get though.
Many people panic. A lot of people don't understand how food issues work so following is a quick explanation:
There seem to be some misconceptions around food issues.
Misconception 1: All issues are allergies, and any other issues are minor and don't require changes.
Yes, not all food issues are allergies. However many people refer to food issues as allergies in general, though this is not medically correct. Allergies are those things that range from hives to anaphylaxis. People can have issues with food that are not technically allergies, but can still be fairly serious health issues if the food is ingested. Celiac's disease is an example of this. Intolerance can still lead to diarrhoea, severe abdominal cramping, loss of fluids resulting in dehydration, foggy brain symptom, bowel damage such as bleeding from the bowel, etc.
I hope this helps you to see food issues aren't just all in the person's head, or if they are simply intolerant they can eat a little bit. It can get confusing because people have varying levels of allergies and intolerances, and what one person can tolerate another can't. To muddy the waters further some people will eat things that make them extremely sick because they don't have the willpower to forgo the cake.
People learn by watching. So when Johnny sees Daisy can eat a tiny bit of egg even though she says she is allergic (actually she is intolerant) he thinks Jess will be able to have a small amount of egg also. However Jess may be severely intolerant, already in too much pain, or even allergic, meaning if she has this it will make her very sick.
I get this kind of problem a lot. Even people with celiacs sometimes eat things with gluten. And they end up extremely sick for several hours. But they do it anyway. So people who know me observe others eating the gluten, and can't understand why I'm such a stickler for ensuring I don't consume any.
What they haven't observed or felt is the pain and problems that lasted for around 2 weeks after one episode. There isn't anything quite like passing blood from your bowels to frighten you at 3am. Or the almost exact prescribed diet for weeks afterward to desperately recover. How about the brain fog, that caused depression and also resulted in extreme anxiety as I wasn't able to think straight, and couldn't hold a thought for more than a few seconds. It basically debilitates me.
Fortunately most people don't have extreme reactions to food like I do. (Be grateful.)
Misconception 2:
Because I have food issues I think no-one should eat gluten, dairy, egg, etc., and I would be offended if I see others eating it.
Seriously?! I have a friend who is anaphylatic to nuts. Someone has to eat them for her. I used eat bread. I can understand it tastes nice. Eat all the bread. Exercise so you don't get fat. I don't care. Seriously, I don't. Sometimes yes, I might wish I still could eat that stuff. BUT, I am extremely grateful I can eat some foods, and I still have a broad variety of foods I can eat, and at times like this I remember that. As I mentioned, my friend can't eat nuts. I can. I love nuts. She can have dairy. I can't. It sucks. But since I value my life I stopped eating dairy, because I do appear* to be allergic - not just intolerant.
*My doctor said I am based on my symptoms, but I haven't been officially tested.
Misconception 3:
I expect everyone to cook special food for me.
That would be a huge ask. I never expect that. There are very few people in my life who will invite me over for a meal without it being a large discussion or end in me just doing entirely my own food. Pretty much the only person who can cook for me, and I don't need to ask questions or vice versa is my sister who lived with me when I was diagnosed, and a few others who have lived with me in that time also.
I do find this hard though. Please understand I've had to make huge life changes, and now, many, many people don't/won't/can't cook for me. So I can't just rock up to a BBQ at the last minute. I have to be super organised, and I almost never eat out or eat something I didn't cook. If I go anywhere I usually have to either provide a shopping list with places items I can eat can be purchased, go shopping the second I step off the plane, or bring food with me. This may explain for some people why sometimes I get panicky about a situation and/or I end up running very late to an event. Please don't suggest I eat bad food at this point. That is like driving a knife in the wound, and could be disastrous if I take your advice. It won't go astray if you offer any person foods without the dangerous ingredient(s). Communication is the best way to deal with this. Yes, there are people who do basically demand everyone cater for them, but my experience is that kind of expression is not intentional.
On a final note: not everyone is me, so while this might help in general, communicating with the person who has the allergies, their treating health professional and/or their parent/caregiver will provide the best answer to helping that person. :)
